This was probably one of the most
gut-wrenching traumatic days I have spent in a long while. It was worse for the women who spoke, but
those of us who listened came out with our equanimity shattered.
I have been writing about women, about
violence, about neglect, about inequality, about injustice, for more than three
decades. Yet, on April 10, 2018, as I sat
with a panel of four other women listening to woman after woman testifying, I
saw how little has changed.
Laws have been changed. But mindsets have not. New laws have come in. But their non-implementation is identical to
what happened in the past. In other
words, nothing has changed.
Majlis and several other non-governmental
organisations working with women on issues concerning sexual violence, divorce,
maintenance, child abuse etc came together to conduct a jan sunvai. The idea was to give women a chance to tell
their stories, and then to strategise what could be done to address their
individual problems, as well as the larger systemic issues that their
individual experiences exposed.
Around 40 of the 72 who had recorded their
testimonies with the different groups came in person to speak. These were women cutting across community --
Hindu, Muslim and Christian. Amongst
them were middle class white-collar workers as well as poor uneducated women
doing odd jobs or working as domestics.
What was common was that all of them were victims of domestic violence
in one form or the other and all of them were seeking some form of justice from
the criminal justice system. And had
failed in doing so.
This is why they turned to an NGO, in the
hope that this would give them some respite.
But Majlis and the others narrated their frustration too at the many
roadblocks on the way to getting justice for these women, many of them systemic,
embedded in a corrupt and uncaring system where the word of a poor person, and
particularly a poor woman, simply does not count.
By the end of the three hours, my ears were
ringing and my hands were hurting from taking down notes. Each testimony was searing. But some I will never forget.
She is small built and spoke quietly,
without any drama. She told us that her
husband is an alcoholic, that he would beat her even when she was pregnant. As a result, she had an abortion. She
described the house where she lived.
There were two rooms. She, her
husband and the child slept in one and her father-in-law in the other. One night she found her father-in-law in bed
next to her, with his hand on her chest, even though her husband was asleep on
the other side. When she shouted and
woke up the latter, he refused to believe her.
She also narrated how she had weaned her
daughter off the breast and got her used to drinking milk from a feeding bottle. One night, she found her husband had the
two-year-old on his chest, and then saw him slowly lower her so that she could
suck on his penis. She shouted at him but he continued. Finally, she went to
the police and filed a case under Protection
of Children from Sexual Offences Act, 2012 (POCSO) in which it is mandatory
for the police to register the offence. Despite this, the husband has not been
arrested. She has also filed a case against her father-in-law for sexual
harassment. But again, nothing has
happened because the husband has contacts with the police through a local
politician.
Then there is a dowry case. Who says the problem has disappeared? After she got married, this woman's husband
demanded a motorcycle. When her parents
could not pay for it, she was beaten and left for days without food. He would tell her that the only reason he
married her was for sex. She was beaten
so badly, that she had to be admitted to hospital and all this within three
years of her marriage. Her father had
sold his shop to pay for the marriage and had nothing more to give. Finally, she was compelled to move out and go
to her parents. Yet when this woman went to the police to register a case
against the husband, the police wanted proof of how much money had been spent
on the marriage and how much had been given to the bridegroom. She says she stood for 15 days in the police
chowky and they still did not take down her complaint. "Sometimes we went there are 12 midnight
and stayed till three in the morning, waiting", she said. Instead of helping or taking down her
complaint, the police keep sending her to another police station.
Even if the police do not help, under
provisions of the Domestic
Violence Act, the designated Protection Officer (PO) should come to the aid
of such women. Yet several women spoke
of how the PO told her that they never take note of a complaint the first time
it comes and tell women to go back and try and work it out. Even if they went with a social worker, the
latter was shouted at and insulted.
One of the most heart-rending cases was
that of a four-year-girl who had been raped.
When the family found her, and realised what had happened, they went to
the police to register a complaint and took the child to the hospital. It took them hours to get the medical
examination done. The child was traumatised and exhausted. A few weeks later, she was raped again. This time, she refused to let the doctors
touch her when they wanted to examine her.
The mother was asked to sign a document saying that "the
victim" would not cooperate. The
little girl's sister, who narrated all this, appeared equally traumatised. How
can she believe that there is justice in the world if a little baby is put through
this kind of treatment after being assaulted?
There were many more testimonies but there
is a thread that runs through all of them.
First, the nature of the horrific violence
they experience in their homes is virtually indescribable. One woman spoke of how her husband went out
and bought leather belts to beat her and that her children had to apply balm to
the welts on her back. Yet despite the relentless nature of such violence, and even
after filing cases, many of these women have nowhere to go and choose to live
in the matrimonial home because of their children. In one case, the abusive husband would enter
the house, sit near the door, douse himself with kerosene and threaten to set
himself and the entire family on fire if they complained.
Second, in almost every instance, when they
did go an try and register a complaint with the police, most often because
there was a social worker around to help, they were routinely told to go back
and settle the matter as it was a domestic issue. At most, the police would take down an NC (non-cognisable)
complaint whereby the abusive husband cannot be detained or arrested.
Third, even those who succeeded in filing
cases, and sought help through the free legal aid service that was available,
got no relief. The lawyers assigned to
their cases were indifferent, inefficient and often demanded money. Most of them could not afford private lawyers
and their exorbitant fees.
Fourth, under the Domestic Violence Act,
Protection Officers (PO) are assigned to handle such cases. In Mumbai, these POs, although still not in
adequate numbers, have been given extensive training and sensitisation courses. Yet, they continue to be rude and indifferent
to the complainants, sending them home and telling them that they never
register a first complaint. The women
say that both the police and the POs seem to only care if a woman is either
near death, or dead.
Fifth, the experience in hospitals is as
bad as at police stations. There is a
long delay before a medical examination is held, the victims are made to run
around from one place to another and sometimes even turned away. The entire process, including having to
narrate details of the attack to the doctor, with others listening, makes the
victim revisit the trauma several times over. And although there are funds now
for one-stop crisis centres, these exist mostly on paper.
I might add here that the media has failed
to bring out sufficiently these systemic problems in the justice delivery
system in cases of violence against women.
Some select cases are reported in depth, but the widespread prevalence
of this problem doesn't impinge on people because these issues are simply not
reported.
For instance, there is hardly any reporting
on dowry harassment or dowry deaths. If
you skim through the print media, you might well believe that the giving and
taking of dowry, and the torture of women in connection with dowry, has
lessened. But clearly, this is not the
case. In the 1980s, the anti-dowry
campaign by women's groups, after many young women were killed within days and
months of being married, brought to light the horrific nature of this
crime. It remains condemnable even
today, and needs to be monitored, reported and stopped.
The only detailed media report on this
public hearing appeared in The
Hindu this morning. It is a subject
that is waiting for follow up by sensitive journalists who care about the lives
of women, and who expect it a worthwhile cause to expose injustice.
7 comments:
I am so so sad to read this article. Why do we forget that the same women are our mothers and sisters - would we treat them the same way?
This so vividly shatters the misconception that "home"is a safe place.Horrendous violence takes place amidst four walls and is scarcely ever mentioned. You also bring out the lacunae in klaw and redressal systems and "safe" places in the form of shelters etc for abused women.
Can highlight in the media be an effective remedy to curb such grave happenings that sends shivers down the spine of readers? When the degree of pain is palpable to readers, what victims of atrocities would have faced is beyond imagination.
Educational institutions in India, taking cue from such life experiences, should impart life skill lessons and training to girls. Life skills teach them the way to resist and protect themselves and swim to positions of safety. Foreign countries where safety of women is under threat, impart these skills. India, currently nowhere in the ranking should work on it to improve on gender related development.
Highlight in media is propagation but imparting life skills is action on ground.
My name is roshni i m from rajnandgaon chattisgarh 2012 mai meri shadi hui thi husband marta aur taang karta tha .meri sister ki bhi halat meri jaisi thi ..mere mummy papa nhi h dadi aur bhai h humne unse help ka kaha phle to wo ha bol diye fir mana kar diye bole aap log ki problem hai .fir hum dono behno ne property ka case kar diya .aur fir mai apne mayke aa gyi 4 saal se yaha hu thode bahut jhagde hote rehte the 26 june ko bahut jyada ladai hui. bhai aur dadi local police ki help se mujhe ghar se nikalne ko bolne lage mujhe 26 june se khana bhi nhi diye.mujhe samajh nhi aa rha ab mai kaha jau .mere pass na job h na ghar na koi sahara abhi tak suna tha beti sasural mai safe nhi h but ab beti mayke mai bhi safe nhi .pls koi meri help kare
Omg . Being an Asian British and living abroad. Shame, shame on India as a Nation. Women are just pieces of.... . May the country burn!!!
Get rid of this site!
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